Not Every Place Is Meant to Be Home

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Hey Gang,

I used to think strength meant staying no matter the cost. If something felt heavy, I assumed the answer was to push harder. If I felt drained, I told myself to be tougher. If growth wasn’t happening, I believed the problem had to be me.

Then the other night, on a quiet hike, something simple stopped me. The sun was beginning to drop, the air cooling just enough to feel gentle. Along the trail, I noticed a cactus standing alone;  weathered, still, unbothered by the harsh desert around it.

It survives where most things can’t. Not because the desert is kind, but because the cactus is built for that environment. It doesn’t demand more water than the land can give. It doesn’t fight the heat. It adapts, stores what it needs, and grows according to its surroundings.

And something clicked. We don’t judge a cactus for not thriving in a forest. We don’t expect it to bloom beside a river. We understand that its survival, and its beauty, depend on where it’s planted.

Yet somehow, we don’t offer ourselves that same grace. 

We aren’t designed to thrive everywhere. A plant doesn’t question its worth because it can’t grow in sand. It doesn’t shame itself for needing sunlight. It doesn’t apologize for wilting when the soil can’t hold water. It simply responds to its environment.

Yet as humans, we do the opposite. We stay in rooms that drain us. We remain in rhythms that keep us in survival mode. We keep trying to bloom in places that never supported growth to begin with.

And when it doesn’t work, we internalize it. I must not be disciplined enough. I must not want it badly enough. Everyone else seems to manage, why can’t I?

But sometimes the reason trying harder hasn’t worked is because effort can’t override environment.

There are seasons where survival is necessary, where simply making it through the day is an act of courage. But survival was never meant to be permanent housing.

You are not failing because you’re tired. You’re tired because your roots have been searching for nourishment that isn’t there. The truth is quiet, but freeing: You don’t need to become someone else. You need to stand somewhere different.

Strength isn’t always staying. Sometimes strength is listening to the part of you that whispers, This isn’t where I’m meant to grow. And maybe you don’t know exactly where that place is yet. That’s okay. You don’t need a map, only honesty.

Ask yourself gently: Where do I feel most like myself? Where does my energy return instead of disappear? Where do I stop bracing and start breathing?

Because the place that lights you up isn’t imaginary. It exists. And when you find it, you won’t need to fight so hard to become who you’re meant to be.

You’ll finally have soil deep enough for your roots.


Talk soon,


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